Comical Explorer Pillows

'If you must know Harriet; I'm heading for the Pacific Rim.'

"No, this isn't Mt. Sinai..."

Iran bars two UN nuclear inspectors for 'untruthful reporting'

'In the interest of spending more time with my children, I've put Bobby and Emily in charge of corporate strategy.'

The Great Rainbow of China

The secret to happiness is knowing how to keep a secret.

"We don't like the same marriage counselor gags anymore."

Lambo

Surreal scene depicting a dry cleaner shop interior, with pant zipper flies stuck to a fly strip.

STRIP "Looks like the escalators on the blink again"

'Time ou! ... Flea!'

"I just attained enlightenment! - Gimme a high-five!"

"Day 1: Back in the carrier."

'Have you done any stand-up?'

"I have to go wee-wee."

"Oh, sure, Mr. Nice Guy robot, bringing in the pastries...we get fat and you just sit there, charging your batteries!"

'He arrested two kids yesterday. One for drinking battery acid, the other was eating fireworks. He charged one and let the other off!'

"Call a veterinary, chief. I think he's got a kidney infection..."

"Have you ever wondered what would happen if a giant hair ball were to slam into the earth?"

'What a beautiful landscape!'

"What have I told you about shoplifting, son!"

Mr. Briggs' Adventures in the Highlands, part 4.

'I gave the Captain a thousand bucks to strand us on an uninhabited island with nothing but a musket.'

"I showed Tia Carmen these really funny cartoons I drew...but she didn't laugh."

"Of course I flunked the spelling test. My pencil doesn't have spell check!"

"I just don't think our relationship will work out, honey."

Man caught in fishing lines

"Oh, look - a Halloweiner dog!"

'Poor Oog -- evolution sure has AGED him!'

"Why do we do this again?"

'Wait! -- We'll never develop a meaningful relationship if you keep knocking me unconscious!'

Gurus wise words on lost socks