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Cop club

The hostage rescue team

"Just put one foot directly in front of the other, sir, and walk in as straight a line as possible."

"We're all metric now..."

"Next time the killer comes on your radio do not say 'COPY THAT'."

'....and how big was this bee, Sir?'

' We have ways of making them talk but how do we make them shut up ?!! '

"Victor one to control...we want to report a stolen car, Sergent - A white saloon with a little blue flashing light on top..."

'Great News - it's not psoriasis . . . it's just an itchy trigger finger.'

'Yeah it looks like we finally caught that peeping tom...'

'Number three. Definitely number three.'

"Do you really want to tell me that you don't know anything about the vanishing of 21 socks within the last four months??!"

"It's a disaster Sir: most new recruits suffer from some kind of ADHD or phone addiction and can't follow a trail for more than 30 seconds..."

'Good cop - bad cop is enough. We don't need morally ambiguous cop.'

'Looks like an inside job to me, Sarge.'

'You've been with the canine unit too long Ralph!'

"I've got him! I've got him!...Now what?"

Christmas Police

'Just showing him how much taller he needs to be to join your lot!'

"This locksmith bill is outrageous. People, please—when you lock 'em up, don’t throw away the key.”

"Avon calling..!"

Police Warning - Flash photography can seriously damage your driving licence.

"Don't taser me, Bro!!! Does he know we're Mall Cops?"

Good Cop, Bad Cop, Lousy Cop

"I decided to ticket you 'cause I'm bored again."

Man walking past a policeman. He noticed pig hooves coming out the bottom of the policeman's pants.

"May I speak freely?"

'I'm sorry sir, but I'm arresting you for impersonating an undercover police officer.'

'This is your third speeding fine this week. You are banned from the store.'

'And what makes you think you're being followed?'