Comfort Food Critic T-Shirts

"Tia Carmen? Is there anything else to eat?"

"Actually, you're in excellent health. The only thing I recommend is that you cut back on carbs...and that means cutting back on your favorite dishes."

"I'm putting myself through med school by waiting tables. I'll be back shortly to take your blood pressure."

Down with Chicken Soup Books

"If mashed potatoes are comfort food, does that make broccoli uncomfortable food?"

"I get uncomfortable around comfort food."

A woman standing beside a stove full of steaming pots and pans.

'I couldn't stand the heat, so I got out of the kitchen.'

What the Doctor Ordered

Soup of the month.

Heavy man sees 'Comfort Food' aisle

"Instead of years of therapy, I decided to go for chocolate."

"I'll have the barbecued half-pounder, with all the ramifications."

I love Cannelloni

Gramma's Tators & Gravy...All You Can Eat!

"We'd better stock up on TV snacks in the event of war."

'What wine goes with comfort foods?'

"Can you turn these mashed potatoes into french fries?"

''Food miles' is a big issue, so I'm reducing the distance my food travels by moving my fridge into the living room.'

"You've ordered comfort food. May I recommend a comfort wine?"

"When I was young, we personally prepared all the food for each and every meal!"

"The economy's been worsening for a while, but people still don't feel it, Rudy." "...Which means we still have time to get in on the despair action." "Despair action"? "We're going to expand our menu. Add more comfort foods, more 'sale' items, debt consolidation loans..." "Nobody's dumb enough to get a debt consolidation loan from some random guy." "Ha ha hoo hoo hee-"

"I think I'll have the fish. No, wait... yes, the fish." "So many choices... what is a Reuben? Never mind, I'll have the fish, too." "I always get the same thing, but it's so good. Alright, I'll have the fish."

Midwest Winter Items.

"It's completely normal for someone your age to develop a taste for butterscotch."

"I think we need to have a chat about your 'support team'..."

'The doctor told me to introduce more greens into my diet.'

Man with a pizza in 'Lover's Lane.'

"Can you recommend a nice red wine that goes well with a broken heart?"

'Bacon-butties are my favourite!'

"I know it's our first date and we're at this fancy restaurant and all, but would it be a red flag if I ordered the chicken fingers?"

'Actually, it's good, old fashioned, chicken soup.'

"Would you like to hear tonight's specials, or have you already closed yourselves to new experiences?"

Ice Cream Flavors

"Welcome to the Short Staffed Cafe serving food like your grandma cooked. Is your grandma busy? We really need a cook."