Comedic Relief In Chaos Mugs

"Thanks, but can we hurry it along? I'm going to be late to my hoarders therapy session."

"Soul searching? Yes, you could call it that."

"Until the plaster sets, try not to laugh."

"Who's got the hammer?"

'Yes, as a matter of fact, you have caught me at a bad time.'

Man with fishing line going into water. Fishing line coming down from sky.

While old, sick, and weak animals remained targets, the lions most enjoyed culling the herd of its sarcastic teenagers.

Breast Height Chart

Only then, did Medusa realise her mistake.

"Hang on, I know I came into the kitchen for something..."

Insecurities of the Bald Eagle.

'The guys say that the stripper won't be available before our wedding...would you mind if I had my bachelor party after the honeymoon?'

Impractical Guide to Having Babies: I need backup...NOW!

'Just remember, he's bigger, but you're funnier. As soon as he starts laughing, you've got him!'

Pessimists v Optimists.

'What makes you think no-one understands you?'

'I used to trade in futures until I learned the planet doesn't have one.'

Biological Alarm Clock.

"Haven't you a small one that would fit into a soldier's pack?"

"It's only until the gas prices go down and I can afford to drive the car again. Maybe you should have an ambulance follow me."

'Alright, alright. I had a hard day fighting crime. No need to get smart about it.'

"If you'll excuse me fellas. I have to see a man about a dog. Specifically-this dog."

'Cool it with the herbal shampoo -- you've got aphids.'

"Whisky? Have you got anything stronger?"

Cat doctor to cat patient sitting on exam table 'All I'm saying is liposuction won't help if you don't lay off the tuna smoothies.'

'The pain in my head always seems to subside when I flush your bills down the toilet!'

'Will you tell the dog I live here!'

Pirate Paddle Boat.

"I guess I'll never understand women."

"You keep him busy while I go for help."

'It's your lucky day. I just went vegan.'

'Until you remember where you put the ladder, be quiet!'