Comedic Food Lover Mugs

'The dietary exchange for this food is 3 days of unrelenting remorse.'

Salsa on a Stick.

Dessert Storm Veteran

'He's trying to put some magic into my recipes.'

'Do you call this spaghetti'

'Apparently the nutrients and the additives cancel each other out.'

'Do you want toast with that?'

Ordering Food At A French Restaurant.

'Where do you want to go for breakfast, fancy an Australian or do you want to nip over to Hawaii?'

'Ooh girl, he may look like a potato, but he moves like a yam!'

Aiiiii! Fat! Cholesterol! Food!

"Gimme a double burger between two burgers. And hold the lettuce; it only dilutes the experience."

'I'm a very busy man - this way I am able to hunt and cook at the same time.'

Why Shirley hates to eat genetic modified Broccoli.

"I still call it a custard tart but to be honest, it's a dairy free, soy fructose mix, with no nuts."

'I know you're in a hurry, so I ran all the leftovers through the blender.'

'Add three eggs, a pinch of salt, two ounces of olive oil and the phone number of a local pizza in delivery in case this recipe doesn't work out.'

Beard helper

'Andy STILL hasn't got the hang of spaghetti..'

"Keep that recipe handy. The police might want it as evidence."

Frozen Fish

'I feel so proud. Dad says my cooking is just like Mum's.'

"I never remember, do you brine before or after you get attached to him."

"Hold on ... I think a table's about to open up."

'All you can eat, burgers.'

"Are you the gent who complained about cold soup?"

"And Billy will have the Stomach Stable-Buster."

We were asked to insure them against poisoning their guests.

'Letting you pick up the check will help you stay on your diet.'

Mom's Home-Deforested Cooking!

Our Village Industrial Competition.

Chinese noodles.

'Unexpected item in bagging area.'

"It's not having seconds that's the problem. It's having fifths and sixths!"

"I have no trouble losing weight...it's just that I'm better at finding it."