Comedic Explorer T-Shirts

"Oh SURE!! Run away when there's WORK to do!!"

'Careful Carruthers, it could be a computer simulation.'

'I chose the jockeys wearing the prettiest colours and I'm doing better than him!'

Gurus wise words on lost socks

"I have to go wee-wee."

"Travel book says do not land on Earth unless you have your own health insurance."

Garden stagger

"Call a veterinary, chief. I think he's got a kidney infection..."

"Of course I flunked the spelling test. My pencil doesn't have spell check!"

Arctic slip hazard...

Lambo

Airport Security.

Wedding Day Itinerary.

"If God had meant us to fly, he'd give us more leg room!"

'So much for your new Satnav!'

"Boss, I guarantee you that my intentions with your daughter are serious."

'Please, could you me to Polish my diet!'

'I told you not to rely on the sat-nav.'

'They're right.polorized sunglasses do help you see better underwater.'

"How can we get away from it all if you're bringing it all with you?"

''It's me or your stupid racing pigeons' I said - then immediately regretted it.'

Touring Holidays - On the P***

"You heading south again this summer?"

"Young lady! You aren't going anywhere dressed like that!"

"He's a super-calloused fragile mystic, hexed by halitosis."

'That time of year, eh Ben, don't know whether to go hunting or fishing?'

"It's taken her years to develop that naive, spontaneous, style."

'Time ou! ... Flea!'

Vestibular Nerve: What it takes for a Vestibular System to wear paisleys with with pin stripes.

Flying Ear Specialist

'Do you have anywhere where they'd think I was good looking.'

Student to teacher: 'If my paper is late it's because I'm waiting for the most current event.'

"Lost, what are you talking about? I'm not lost!"

'We're lost - I told ye to take the low road.'

'If they let me take you home for christmas, I'll be able to unwrap you with the presents...'