Comedic Cook Pillows

We were asked to insure them against poisoning their guests.

"It's right when you think it's done, but it's not done, that it's most dangerous."

"I never remember, do you brine before or after you get attached to him."

Mom's Home-Deforested Cooking!

'Add three eggs, a pinch of salt, two ounces of olive oil and the phone number of a local pizza in delivery in case this recipe doesn't work out.'

"Here's to another Lag B'Omer of eating meat that is burnt on the outside and raw on the inside, with our faces blackened by smoke!"

'He's trying to put some magic into my recipes.'

'Do you call this spaghetti'

'Apparently the nutrients and the additives cancel each other out.'

"More helium."

'Do you want toast with that?'

Ordering Food At A French Restaurant.

'Where do you want to go for breakfast, fancy an Australian or do you want to nip over to Hawaii?'

'Ooh girl, he may look like a potato, but he moves like a yam!'

Aiiiii! Fat! Cholesterol! Food!

'Guys, I think this is one of those 'let it go' moments in life when you have to relax and just trust the processor!'

"Gimme a double burger between two burgers. And hold the lettuce; it only dilutes the experience."

'I'm a very busy man - this way I am able to hunt and cook at the same time.'

'I know you're in a hurry, so I ran all the leftovers through the blender.'

Beard helper

Dessert Storm Veteran

Why Shirley hates to eat genetic modified Broccoli.

"I still call it a custard tart but to be honest, it's a dairy free, soy fructose mix, with no nuts."

'All you can eat, burgers.'

"And Billy will have the Stomach Stable-Buster."

"Are you the gent who complained about cold soup?"

'Andy STILL hasn't got the hang of spaghetti..'

"Keep that recipe handy. The police might want it as evidence."

Frozen Fish

'I feel so proud. Dad says my cooking is just like Mum's.'

'The dietary exchange for this food is 3 days of unrelenting remorse.'

Cat looking up fish recipes.

Salsa on a Stick.

'Happy Valentine's Day!'

Our Village Industrial Competition.