Come Back King Mugs

'His fifth comeback to the ring...and only his first fight!'

Smart Ass - Wise Ass

'Don't be silly- of course you're going into the family business!'

...gon make you sweat...gon make you groove

TV-Man

"'Conquer Spain'? 'Balance the budget'? 'Reform the justice system'? -- You call this a honey-do list?"

"This number goes out to all the little people I met on my way back down."

'I like you, you've got balls.'

'Guess what? I won again.'

"And in the category of 'The Most Amazing Comeback from an Academic Nosedive,' the winner is..."

The Unhappy King

'Don't bother Daddy -- He fell in the moat again.'

'If he's only five years old, how come he knows the words to 'See the USA in your Chevrolet'?'

'Not gruel, stupid! -- I said find the GRAIL!'

'Good news from the field, sire! Attila did not like the referee's call, so he's folding up his tents, taking his ball and going home!'

"I'm so happy to be back in the workforce I'll never complain out loud again about Mondays."

The Royal Wii

'Make him laugh, make him cry.'

"I believe I can fly, I believe I can touch the sky..."

'I cut myself slashing the budget!'

Everybody forgot his jubilee.

A war would have been bad enough, but losing Alsace-Lorraine in a poker game?

'You can scratch your back when the war is over!'

(Mother Goose: playboy's Mirthful Master of the Macabre serves Up Some Strange Twists On a Clutch of Children's Classics.) "Is this supposed to be somebody's idea of a joke?"

X Factor contestant dressed as a 'Y'.

'Could you scoot your chair over this way a little dear?'

Comedy, Tragedy, Karaoke

'Between you and me Wizard, is it true that you intellectuals have pointed heads?'

The Bar & Grill of Ordinary Men: Quiet Desperation 11 am - closing (Karaoke on Saturday)

'You might want to try another photographer, Sire. This one tends to cut the heads off.'