Collector Of Imperfections Pillows

'What are those brown marks?' - 'The original rust.'

"We found the poor thing stranded on the beach last summer and decided to adopt it."

Larry's used art

Seagiraffes

"Don't worry about your purchase not working. Everything we sell here is totally non-functional."

'The ghost walks this passage every night Monday to Friday. He has weekends off.'

"Will you have a Sphinx?"

"I warned you not to use that club...now look, you struck oil!"

"Sorry. I just find rotating my head helps me to relax during the test."

Duck Hunt

Cut out and keep your own Christmas Caterer.

Raincloud Umbrella

'Going...Going...Gone! Sold to the lady with more money than sense.'

Early cyborg.

Thinks he's too cool for school.

Best before 65 million BC.

"We're looking for something for our panic room."

"I don't know about you, but it always makes me feel kinda special."

"You're lucky someone was nice enough to turn it in."

"Trust me, this is as weird for me as it is for you."

"Oh, I'm thrilled with my new dog! He's sort of a hunter/retriever/plumber/electrician."

A man walks his dog wearing a cone.

"Now, why didn't I think of that?"

"Dear? The toothpaste is on the top shelf. Don't touch the tube on the bottom shelf, that's Grandma's triple strength epoxy denture adhesive."

"I don't think our smart home likes the color we painted it. It keeps spitting it out."

Stuff: You Don't Really Need But Still Don't Have.

Ice shelfie.

'Anorak anoraks'.

A trevor of trainspotters

Fred Dinsdale - Forensic expert.

"I'll give you $5 for that shirt."

Inflating Boobs.

It's great for pulling the birds!

"Things are looking up!"