Collector Of Fine Things Pillows

'We met through a shared interest - me.'

Wine boutique with only one bottle.

'Buy old masters, they hold their value better than old mistresses.'

Posh Easter Egg

Great Chinese Dynasties

"You're on a what?!"

Venn Diagram: DIamonds

"I got a swiss army hook!"

Stuff: You Don't Really Need But Still Don't Have.

'Being stuck on a desert island is one thing, but being struck on a desert island with a hoarder...'

'I don't think I've ever heard of the Geezer Scouts or Geezer Scout cookies.'

'This thing better hold. I don't know about you, but I don't find plan B very reassuring.'

"My goodness, no! Grandfather would never, ever let us near this!!"

Fridge Magnets/Military Medals

'It's nice but will it be a hedge against inflation.'

In the House of Picasso, the Cat: "You beast, you've eaten all the first class stamps again," Madame accuses Timothy.

'It even tells time in metric minutes.'

'Not till you're sixteen.'

"Whoever said 'There's nothing new under the sun' first, was a hypocrite."

An old gentleman speaking with a shoeblack at a train station

Man tried to unload a ship in a bottle.

"Did you hear? It turns out old power cords are really valuable! Good things Dad kept them!"

A mummy begs for change in front of the pyramids.

"Hi honey, do we need anything for the junk drawer?"

'Jack and the Beanie stock'

Victorian Secret

"I like this one. Do you think it will look good when knocked from the table to the floor?"

'The 89's are very forward with meat on the nose and a lingering marrow-bone finish.'

"Don't worry dear, accidents happen. Besides, thanks to you and your feather duster, I've just sold it to a collector for twice the original asking price."

Own a piece of history - floodwaters

Seven dwarves marching through a living room.

'He was just the same with my frankincense - more interested in the box!'

Swiss Army General.

Frankenstein Collectibles: Buyer Beware

"Edgar, don't you think it's time you donated a wing somewhere?"