Coaching Strategist Pillows

Head Coach, Offensive Coordinator, Post-Touchdown Choreographer

"Just another 50 decibels on your grunt and we can start to think about letting you hit a few balls!"

Coach to football players: 'And no cuddling!'

The MBA Draft

'Wow, the field really is a frozen tundra!'

'Very impressive educational background...now let's discuss WHO you know.!

"There will be a winning team and a losing team. Are you OK with that?"

"England losing from a penalty shootout again!"

'They were hoping to gradually introduce him to the pro game, but injuries left them no choice.'

Old navy veteran 3rd base coach

'You really want that promotion, don't you, Sherman?'

"I AM at my usual position."

"I don't believe I've missed a single sign since you made the switch to Power Point."

I can't decide. Should I go to soccer camp 3 weeks in a row? Or soccer, then baseball then lacrosse camp? 3 soccers. Isn't overspecializing at his age bad? Possibly. But 3 different sports means�buying 3 different sets of expensive equipment. Right, He does have a mean corner kick.

'Will you lot come out! - the new kit's not that bad!'

'I don't understand why you always put me in goal?!'

'OK, everybody, calm down,,,'

'Yes, Jenny, I know I'm always reminding the team to be good sports, but you really don't have to thank the ref after every call.'

Bobby's pitching coach told him to put some stank on the ball.

'We need you to get onto those high balls coming over'

'Now that's the Group of Death.'

'How many times have I told you not to hit the ball with your head?'

"Good news...I found a doctor who says you can still play!"

"To be clear, I said I want your 'A' game, not your 'Eh?' game."

Personal conker trainer.

"Ok, Ok! The ball wasn't out!"

Do you have any other skills?

Perils of the double play.

'And finally. . . where do you see yourself on the food chain 5 years from now?'

'Unbelievable, these guys brought a ringer.'

"Winning isn't everything, Josh. Not being the reason your team loses is everything."

'Wait!... I don't want to take Brady out right now. He's just getting into rhythm.'

"He's got great velocity but his trajectory needs work."

The Other Cooperstown

"Bob doesn't do well in job interviews, so he hired me. I'm a professional actor who specializes in these situations."