Club-swinging Strategist T-Shirts

"I think you should use the wedge, like you're playing from the rough."

'I guess I don't have to tell you how disappointed I am with sales on the front nine.'

'How do you like my fantasy weekend so far?'

'Gee, you beat Roger again!'

"So what's this special distracting tactic you've developed?"

"Now, suppose some guy comes at you balanced between two blocks."

'You should have taken up the game earlier.'

'She'll never look for me here.'

'Tomorrow's special is fish, so wear the flounder suit.'

'You both know the rules -- walk 1 paces, turn, and tee off on each other.'

"Or we could raise your profile by coming out with that pimple on the end of your nose."

Golfer hanging from tree branch to play difficult shot.

'At least we don't have to accomplish anything in order to go to a bowl game.'

Input From The Front Office

"My favorite tea: hot daffodil-infused chamomile with a hint of whiskey. Are you serious? Of course I'm serious! I've been dosing myself with small quantities of poisonous daffodil ever since 1931. You have to build up an immunity if you want to survive in the cutthroat world of Scrabble tournaments."

'This will be tough. The parents can handle Bs and Cs, but I really gotta spin this D in math.'

And if the ball is completely unplayable...

"My computer beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick-boxing!"

'Henry was an undecided voter four years ago when he entered that voting booth, and I'm still waiting for him to decide and come home.'

'I am constantly diversifying my toy portfolio.'

"And when conventional theories don't work, we've got Charnier here to do us a spot of voodoo marketing."

"Game of checkers? Okay, but I'm watching every move you make."

Noughts and crosses hugging and kissing.

"My mommy suggested I try a different advertising approach."

"Saturn. No contest. A deadly, treacherous gas giant ringed by a gossamer halo of ice. It symbolizes both death and life. Both evil and good. It symbolizes existence itself."

'If you know what's good for you Allan, you'll let me pass.'

CX909708

Corporate pirate.

Tom, you may not want to pause so long at the top of your swing.

BUSINESS PRESCHOOL

'Governor game change and his replacement debate moderators...'

The strong corna war

"This'll look great on my transcript!"

"I'm in advertising. . ."

"The answer isn't more troops—what you need is an antibiotic."