Cloud Nine Birdie Gifts

Golf Heaven: Is it like I'd imagined? Yeah, pretty much.

"I thought there would be bacon here."

'I'm being sent back. I told you I have a great attorney.'

Damn defibrillators.

"This is neither Heaven nor Hell. It's the private sector."

Ahhh, spring baseball.

"Your PA isn't due up here for another 27 years. You'll just have to answer the questions yourself."

'I think I'm going to like it here!'

Heavenly Take Out

"It's very nice. I just think they could add a spa."

Heaven on the Phone to Hell - 'We've got Sky.'

Descartes in the afterlife: "I thought therefore I was."

Angel using his hal to play golf.

'Well, what do you think of the new BOOYA halo?'

'Wait ... Nobody brought a ball? Now what are we going to do for all eternity?'

"Sorry. I'm molting."

"Ah...a newcomer to Heaven, I see."

Actually, I was looking for a tax haven.

'Dress code?'

'Angelfood always DID make me break out.'

Please have 2 forms of photo ID ready.

"Open your mouth so I can take a DNA sample."

'I didn't expect Paradise to be so literal...'

"Assigned to cloud nine! I haven't been there since I caught that twelve pound bass!"

'Call me 'Pete'. We're very informal here.'

I know, I was expecting something different too...

'If this were really heaven there would be fire hydrants.'

Heavy angels play ring-toss using halos and thin angel.

Well, that routine physical didn

'I save these for casual Fridays.'

Life after death. It's all about altitude. "Whaz up?" "Aside from you pants - everything."

'I managed to take it with me but it seems to be useless here."

'Sorry, but we've never gotten enough golfers here to make it worthwhile to put in a golf course.'

'Whoever would have thought you couldn't get in without a jacket and tie?'

Whaddaya mean "oops"?