Client Support Specialist Prints

Could you tell them I'll call back as soon as I've dealt with this ravenous Buggblaster from the planet SNARG!

"I'm afraid that due to a recent reorientation of forward facing customer resource functionality you're going to have to make the complaint to yourself... in triplicate."

Online form - Submit.

'Human Error .. Yet Again.'

Computer Expert

Protect Victims of Domestic and Sexual Violence

'This computer has a fast modem, the latest Pentium, increased RAM, a huge hard drive and broadband connections. Only one problem...slow pointer fingers.'

'Yep,that's it Mr.White. And NOW go, Control-Alt-Delete, then re-enter.'

"Did you remember my mints?"

'It says our line printer is obsolete our remote terminal is obsolete, and I'm afraid, we're obsolete.'

Hardware and software

"Oh! It's you! I was expecting the machine."

GO AHEAD ... MAKE MY DAY!

Man feeding his computer money.

Not much money, glory, or praise

'...And, from what I understand, they don't have any hard drive at all.'

"This next one is a typical blues number about exceeding your data plan limit, cracking your ipad screen, and losing your new ear buds."

"The new computer is great, but we can't get rid of the old one. It knows too much."

I've always been slower than computers...

"Get used to verifications. In the court of the internet, you are presumed a robot until proven otherwise."

"I seek enlightenment - and a way to outsource our company's tech support."

'Even though you're the client, it's my duty to tell you you're wrong. . . Ok then. Speak slowly so I can write down your every whim.'

"Well so much for our policy of putting the customer second!"

Early Tech Support

"Wait, mister Samson. The manager said he'll give you a full refund and a year's worth of free stylings."

"Is that Technical Support? My computer's fine - I just don't know how to operate my chair."

'But we just fed the meter for another hour.'

"Gary! Thank God you're home. The automatic pet feeder seems to be malfunctioning again."

"Mrs. Beetle, Marty's screen is frozen, again."

Kevin had a computer virus.

"Let's all sing our theme song: 'I Love Venture Capital'."

"Error 404: Brain not found"

Communication

"Ah — excellent catsup."

"More croutons, sir?"