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Clancy: Just the One

'The secret to doing a book report is only picking books that have been made in to movies.'

McMorkim's Cheeses Security A gang of mice wheeling in a giant mousetrap with Pizza and Beer as bait to a Security Guard's post hoping to gain access to a cheese Factory if the Guard is trapped.

"well done rescuing my son. Now, your final task is to quietly transfer the baby to the cradle upstairs, without waking him."

Rusty, not believing in God, seized his chance...

"I'm just going to ring the doorbell so I have a chance of a spot in the bed."

A cat is hiding in a block of cheese to lure a mouse out of its hole.

'My hot-shot assistant was named as one of the top 10 to watch."

"To lose weight they said I've just had to give up two things. . .food and drink!"

An outstanding high school pole vaulter, Kevin was never caught coming home late,

"Can I have another free biscuit for my dog?" "Sure." "Can you warm this one up? Maybe sprinkle some cinnamon and sugar on it, and maybe make it three biscuits?" "You sure this is for your dog?" "Can you also sprinkle a little turkey on it?"

Kid Hints To Santa That He Wants A Bicycle For Christmas

'You'll want Mr. Pigglesworth's version of the story too, I assume?'

'This time, put it someplace where we can find it.'

In Disguise.

"I don't think he can touch your in-the-dirt ball."

"I cased the joint, and it turns out they'll just give you money if you work thirty-five hours a week as a teller."

Furtive Milking

"This is just between you and me and the lamppost." "I'll sell it to the tabloids."

"So Marty, how's business these days?" "Great. I've just sold my homing pigeon for the 34th time."

'It's the simple things.'

'Now there goes a good Salesman...!'

Visit Santa today...sponsored by Acme Razor Company

'...How much did he pay you to sneak in here and take his fitness test?'

'You're a fiend, you are, Hardcastle.'

'Curiosity'

Old man stealing sand from a sand box for child

'By the time they realize what's up bear season will be over.'

Man planning on standing on a turntable to aid hammer throw.

Undercover Agent

"No. I can still see you."

Street trader tricking police.

'Heads up, Carl! Pinch runner!'

Fish get smart.

"I told the missus I'd be pottering around the garden all weekend."