Classroom Chaos Enthusiast Pillows

"Every day it's the same. My class starts out as Sesame Street and ends up as Jerry Springer."

'This is not the seating plan your teacher left me.'

'I'm afraid Miss Johnson has lost control of her class!'

Silence - Exam in progress. 'Invigilating is not what it was...'

Announcement over school PA: 'We're going to begin this week with an all-school search for Mr. Ridley - last Friday's substitute teacher.'

'Topping it all off, parents now want us to see if we can bring in UN Peace Keepers.'

'I guess what happens in Kindergarten, doesn't stay in Kindergarten.'

'Alright...Who shot this booger across the room?'

"Hey! Paper aeroplanes don't grow on trees, you know!"

"Alright, who was it? I said no one is to make a peep!"

"I think I'd rather fight you again than go in there!"

"The kindergarteners have breached their classroom confines, and are headed this way. We'll be overrun within minutes. What should we do?"

"Fear not, Miss Hathaway. Just go home and listen to a cd of howling wolves or screeching monkeys and by Monday you'll be ready for your 3rd grade class."

"There's something weird about Emily. She actually likes school!"

'I started out as a teacher's pet, and then it kind of snowballed.'

'Smashing party, Miss - can we have another one tomorrow?'

'Thank you for the apple Conrad. But in answer to your question, no, you may not address me as 'Boopsie'.'

'Ms. Shelby, I think you're spinning out of control.'

Global Education

"How was first grade? I don't know yet. I spent all day in the Principal's office."

'He has a learning disorder.'

Beginning of the school year

It could be worse -- there could be 35 teachers for every student

"Alice, please! You're a practice teacher! At some point I have to leave you alone with them!"

'Did I throw which spitball?'

'Why? The year just started! She's not in any trouble. . . Ok. . . yet.'

School boy

"Since I'm your favorite student, do I even have to take this test?"

Volcano Danger: 'We are shutting down your Wright Brothers exhibit until Andy's volcano is dormant again.'

WELCOME TO KINDERGARTEN!, 'It was neat! - they have flat-screen blackboards!'

'I did have an eventful day at school, but nothing, in my opinion, to write home about.'

'A sinkhole ate my homework...?'

'I look forward to my first year as a teacher. I wrote lesson plans, attended in-service workshops, and decorated my classroom. Preparation is half the victory. It's the other half that scares me.'

Never declare a food fight on artichoke day!

'Ok, who threw that?'