Classic Humor Aficionado T-Shirts

Goldilocks and the Three Stooges

A swell going riding is told to be careful because the horse is very fresh.

HMS Pinafore

"Er – if you young people don't mind, I have a few things to do now. Perhaps you have a hotel or somewhere to go?"

'I'm so happy I could help you with your allergy to snakes, Miss Medusa!'

"Call this an iceberg? When I was a kid we wouldn't have called this an iceburg!"

"He reports to Grand Central Palace tomorrow."

'You must have misunderstood, dear -- I'm sure they don't sell old generals at government auctions!'

"Let that breathe a little. But not too much. My last bottle hyperventilated."

'...please switch of all mobile phones, paging devices and alarm watches...'

'He wanted to be remembered this way.'

"I hate to sound like a sergeant, Ralph, but it's ten minutes to six."

A man selling a horse to an older lady

"Hey! I was trained in 1948 and was good enough for then, so it's good enough for now....whipper-snapper!"

Dante Alighieri

'Now, Mrs Althorpe, if you think you see the man who assaulted you, we just want you to touch him on the shoulder.' (Mrs Althorpe beats a man up and then says she doesn't recognise any of them)

Gentleman discovering that his servants have been eating most of his good meat

Sisyphus, 117 million years on

"But wait, there's more."

"I'd like to donate my body to comedy."

Beware Of The Gnome - Look dear how quaint.

"I hope this isn't the start of an insensitive joke that was once considered funny."

Not what he meant.

'Don't be ridiculous, Schaumberg! -- They didn't have Burma-Shave back then!'

Mother Hubbard 2011

Thatcher's child

"What a pity! Mr Grogan took it on the lam not more than five minutes ago."

Ralph Rackstraw HMS Pinafore

'He says he makes house calls, and he'll be over as soon as he gets his horse back from the blacksmith.'

'Walking with cavemen? - I'm sleeping with one.'

Servant girl turning down a job because the family are not genteel enough