Clarity Crusader T-Shirts

'Your proposal is written with clarity and conviction. Send it up to legal for obfuscation.'

'I think I just had an epiphany. How do I make it go away?'

"I keep telling myself I've got to slow down."

"Global warming, income inequalities, protests and COVID-19. Get up and do something! Help out already, now!!!"

"The doctor said I need more calcium, so I'm switching from dark to milk chocolate."

"My holy grail is low-fat, low-cal, high-taste."

"You're still burying your bones? I store mine in the cloud now."

Relaxation Technique

"Those are muzzles for whistleblowers."

Fully decked out in his new skimmer-Boy Mike was able to skim the pool in just 60 seconds,

Calm in the Face of Chaos

'I thought you encouraged self-expression!'

"Is something bothering you?"

"Not again!"

"She says she's from Quality Control. We've failed the furniture inspection."

"I don't object to their right to roam, I just wish they would wipe their feet."

'How do these glasses feel?'

Eye Doctors. Sport Psychologists. Reception. Which focus group are you here for today?

"I'm really having trouble dealing with the global pandemic,economic collapse and cancellation of my weekly yoga class."

"My philosophy has always been 'Don't sweat the small stuff -- it's all small stuff!'"

'About half the students increased speed and lost some comprehension. The other half increased comprehension but lost some speed.'

'I said what I thought, then I apologized when I started losing advertisers. What does that make me?'

The gaming world.

Telescope

Video game

Clancy:Survey Question

The Rat Race

"Ignore everyone."

Tim Russert.

'It's not a JOB, Ma. It's a POSITION.'

"You're very non-competitive. I like that in a brother."

'How long have you been taking these industrial-strength calcium supplements?'

"You don't want to waste your time crayoning on the walls, you wanna get yourelf a couple of spray cans!"

Cloud-Based Security.

The Modern Iconoclast...'Calm down. Things will work out.'