Chronic Illness Management T-Shirts

"I'm at the pharmacy so often all that's missing is a TV, Lay-Z-Boy, and bag of Cheetos."

'I really enjoyed my stay in the hospital - I never get served breakfast in bed at home.'

Disease Management

'Your blood Sugar is very high.'

"I hear he's taking an experimental drug called, 'It Ain't Over Till It's Over.'"

"Unfortunately there's no HMO for what you have"

'I thought it might help you get your mind off things. It's a story of hope and survival. Nothing at all like your story.'

"Ack! This stuff's hard to eat!"

Flo discovered that one of the perks of cancer was that even reluctant friends were willing to give her foot massages,

'Please don't interupt-we've only got 45 minutes.'

"You'll have to take this medication for the rest of your life, but don't worry it's non-addictive."

"Instead of days, my pill organizer is divided into months."

'I'm the doctor - I'll decide what's chronic!'

"Could be worse..." "Could be worse..." "Could be worse..." "Could be... oh, never mind."

"The doctors call it Polymyositis, but I call it 'Military Arthritis' because it comes with a lot of fatigue."

"The bad news is he only has two minutes to live, the good news is it's in football time.""

"I'm not sure the extent of it really comes across in a Zoom consultation, doctor."

'Now this quack wants me to see a specialist- what the hell is a PATHOLOGIST'

Alzheimer's Amusement Park

'Very well, instead of the bible I'll read you Harry Potter but I am still standing behind the lectern.'

'If it has the word 'ectomy' after it, I've already had it.'

'I'm going to prescribe a new diabetic medication. It's a bit costly. I'll start you off with fifty dollars a week.'

"Forget railway season tickets. Stick to day returns from now on."

GPs should prescribe tailored exercise and weight loss to relieve osteoarthritis

"Don't you think it's time to admit to yourself that this rash will not clear up on it's own."

"I was just surprised you put the word 'marriage' next to the question asking if you suffered from a chronic condition."

"He was a prolific writer who made a lot of mistakes and eventually lost his mind. It all sounds so pointless."

National Asthma Society Parade

'Let's see if he makes it through the night. Could you hold off updating his Facebook page until then?'

'If you're bored do some writing.You could start by writing your will.'

Man in hospital bed has EKG with up and down sales charts next to it

"Hopefully my body language tells you all you need to know."

"We had a coolection for you at the office boss.. and.. er.."

Cold Call

Doctor's Office. I don't know which I hate more to hear him say --- "Learn to live with it" or "Learn to live without it."