Christmas Spirit Seekers Pillows

"Don't worry about me, what do you want?"

'Sorry Santa we're over budget for 'meeting the dreams of young children' and we won't have funds for 'screams of delight' until 2016 at the earliest.'

"Sales of banana flavoured reindeer soap are dreadful...it makes you worry that people have forgotten what Christmas is all about!"

Santa on Santa's Lap

"Have you noticed, our insurance policy has expired?"

Boxing day at Santa's house

"It's a letter from the Vatican. They say that whilst walking the streets without stepping into dog poo is nearly as miraculous as walking on water, it's not sufficient to canonize me!"

Santa Claus's wife beats the soot out of his beard.

The Dance of the Penguins Once the March Is Over

"Sure - After the aggressive guys wear it all out!"

Unguided imagery

Lady about the cross: 'Now that all of us have trusted Christ, this is our family tree.'

"Had more ghost-hunters 'round my place last night....scared the daylights outta me!"

'Fischer Says Give Thanks to the Lord!'

Rejoice! It's time to celebrate the baby cheeses!

'You can't come in here with that.'

'Yes, they were using it to clean up the graffiti!'

'How much stuff can I get away with and still go to heaven?'

"I wonder how many people are claiming to be your messiah right now?"

"Finally, Miss Big-Shot calls her dead mother!"

Ice Skater

Snowman

"I'd like to have a word with you about this spirit animal."

Santa CGI Effect

'Your deceased husband keeps saying: don't call him. He'll call you.'

"Do you feel your eyes have changed any since your last visit?" "No. They seem to be ho, ho, ho, holding their own."

You Will Have a Merry Christmas. . . Resistance is Futile.

"Could you help me fit nine days work into five and still see my family?"

'... And your wife says; don't bother looking for the key to the drinks cabinet, because she's hidden it where you'll never find it.'

A Creature WAS Stirring

'How do you think he stays so merry through the holidays?!'

Just one more choccy...

'Well, I'll try, but cheese seems to be the 'must have gift' this year.'

Farmer Christmas.

'Could you carve the Commandments in stone? -- otherwise they'll think I made them up.'