Christian Story Lovers Mugs

"I'm really excited about this opportunity, but I'm hoping there's room to negotiate the title? What about 'Rises-to-the-Occasions-Mary?', or 'Cool-Under-Pressure-Mary?'

"Maybe the next one will be a singles cruise."

"I've told you before one at each end!"

"Hang on, isn't this the second pair of zebras we've had today?"

"Why did we run out of wine?! I'll tell you why...Mary's son brought 12 of his friends who crashed the wedding party! That's why!"

'You say the ARKS are NOT two by two?'

"Maybe you should go make sure we're in the right line."

"And maybe throw in a talking snake to make sure they don't take it literally."

". . . I called this meeting to communicate that I had dinner Noah..."

KING HEROD INTERROGATES THE WISE MEN TO KNOW BABY JESUS'S WHEREABOUTS

"We have plenty of time to catch the ark."

The Kids' Table at the Last Supper

'Tell us the story of Moses again -- I like the chase scene!'

Little Known Moments In History

'Hello Colin, I'm Arthur, any idea what all the fuss is about?'

"If this Goliath bloke is as big as they say, I can just hang around the forest until he's gone."

"The fourth horseman says that he will be late. He hasn't left the Old Testament yet."

'Why did Moses wander in the desert for forty years?'

'Not only will you know everything but I'll see that you get your own talk show.'

Jesus is Scourged (The Holy Bible).

'You brought gold? I thought we agreed to a twenty dollar limit?'

Regifts of the Magi

"Hey samson, nice man bun."

So … how did you two meet?

BRAND-NEW OMG-STORY

"I can never remember if it's smite or smote."

'Noah, before you leave we'd like to have a word with you!'

''Tree of Knowledge,' eh? - Has it been fact-checked?'

Moses' TV guide.

Bloke orders a pizza as Jesus divides the loafs and fishes

"His name is Jonah. Are you sure you haven't seen him?"

'We'd better speed up the Eve project -- Adam's got himself an imaginary playmate.'

"Two for Bethlehem, I assume you want a Virgin flight."

"I told you not to include woodpeckers!"

Monkey's Ejected from the Garden of Eden