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'The History Channel is all reruns.'

"The batteries in his TV remote died. The shock of not being able to use it for two minutes has put him in a temporary state of shock."

'Our regular programs will not be seen tonight, because our Station Manager is in a 'Three Stooges' mood.'

TV-Man

"Well, at least it's an improvement from last night."

Stop! Stop what? Do not change the channel! Sex, death, harrowing footage of the most remarkable story you've ever seen, tattoos, rock-n-roll, action, action, action! It's all coming right up, right after this five second break for station identification. Five seconds ... You're watching Rock Television. And now back to our ... bored. Welcome to ABC. We've got thrills, action, more thrills ... Click. I've got your action right here. We've created a monster. Click click click click click cl-

Check your universal remote control at the door.

Alien uses astronaut's visor as TV to watch news.

'You don't want weather? Not a problem! How about sports, or maybe a nice movie? We can do that! Just put that thing down and let's talk, OK?'

"You need to lose 20 cable channels."

It's only a remote, dear...if you want better programs you will need a wand.

How I met your mother

'Now ask yourself Gerald, do we really need ALL these channels?'

'He gets confused switching channels between the World series and NFL games.'

'She got all the soap opera channels at a discount -- it's some kind of 'frequent cryer' program.'

'Welcome to digital - you now have more of what you didn't want than you ever thought possible!'

Don't touch that dial! — We're experts, and we know what you should be watching!

"I never saw 'Cheers,' so I won't miss 'Cheers.'"

Remote control wars.

"We interrupt this rubbish to give you another chance to switch off."

Digital TV presents "It's true there really is a channel for everyone"

Santa Elevator

'I hope there's something better on the 'other side'!..'

'500 channels...surely there must be something worth watching.'

"We interrupt C.B.S.'s evening news with a special bulletin from N.B.C.!"

"Damned cyclists."

"How many new sitcoms will it make before they find a decent one?" "About twenty something"

Man struggling to carry a giant tv remote control with hundreds of channels.

Transformation of Man into Monster.

"The only thing that stops a bad shark is a good shark."

Mind control

'It creeps me out when he watches the History Channel and takes notes!'

Attention: Due to a lack of interest we have dropped the APATHY channel - Sorry for any inconvenience.

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