Child Prodigy Humor Pillows

"I'm afraid we don't offer student loans to elementary school pupils."

"Can I borrow the car keys?"

"Abstract Expressionism is definitely right for me at this stage of my career."

Boy bringing home an octopus in a fish bowl.

'I know about the birds and the bees. Tell me about the bears and the bulls.'

Human Behavior Institute. Out Experiencing Lunch.

'I'm sure that you are highly qualified. It's just that we're not hiring anyone at the third grade level.'

"You're 5 years old now, Timmy. It's about time you retain an attorney."

"Still believe leaders are born not developed?"

"Being the smartest girl in third grade is going to Melinda's head."

"Viola player coming through!"

'What do you mean you're the new Paediatric Specialist?'

'Who ever came up with the idea that throwing up is fun?'

'Let's play doctor - I'll listen to your heart and you give me all your allowance.'

"If your dad is truly the King of the Jungle, why can't you ask him to abolish school?"

Gracie for Queen...of the universe.

"Nicole’s parents celebrated her curious mind, even in those moments when it really depressed them."

"We're hoping that someday Rosalie will be a major player in the creative economy."

"The kid's good."

"The treasury has hacked into his computer and asked for ideas to solve the deficit"

"I'm sorry-his I.Q. is actually on the charts."

'Music hath charms,' &c.

“Children hate me.”

'Going my way, gorgeous?'

"Do you have any hopeless little drongos?"

'I handed over my company to my son and he's doing better than I ever did. Unfortunately he's starting school next year...'

"I'm training him."

'She is being impossible again.'

"He's watching too much educational TV."

Boy who has eaten oysters and grown fat

"Some people call this an elementary school. Not me. I call it pre-med."

'I'd like you to meet our new programs director.'

"I don't mind him running his own tech company at his age. However, I wish he would, at least, dress his age."

'Beats me why, but it's a sensitive subject: Some people will call you a Buffalo while others will call you a Bison...'

"There's definitely enough growing room."