Chief Breadwinner T-Shirts

'I'd fire him if he didn't have such a large family to support.'

"They must be grown-up ducks, because they're eating the crusts too."

"Helen brings home our second, third and fourth incomes."

A slice of bread walks a tightrope between slots on the toaster.

"I can't wait for vacation - I'm going to go sun myself in a south-facing window."

I know you're bored but you better not be doing that rain dance again!

"Where the hell's my Slinky?"

"My mom is a vegetarian, so she doesn't bring home the bacon. She brings home kale and quinoa."

I bake my own bread.

A gap between the solar panels

A politician's dream come true...

Sun Worship

Agreeable Noises

"Best idea I ever had, those murals."

"Not while they're making artisanal bread."

"It's not that you're too old for a thong, dear. It's just you've got it on backwards."

"King and clown—why can't I be both?"

Spatula beach

...where bikini lines and wrinkles meet

Kate's first task as new principal was to right a number of wrongs.

"Why, this is fit for me!"

J W D Butterworth chief accountant - Pin-stripes made of numbers

"Do you have any marriage bread?"

"I need the sun's energy to warm my blood and give me energy. You could almost say I'm solar-powered..."

"I just dialed 1-800-BAGUETTE."

'Please don't cover me with hot sand, Dear. It makes my skin so oily.'

"Being an everything bagel, doesn’t mean you are expected to do everything."

'You know it's too hot to use the sprinkler when the spray turns to steam.'

At the CEO Store: 'Third Floor: Loopholes, Scapegoats, Acccounting Irregularities.'

The sun luring people to the sea

"You haven't left much room for sun tan lotion"

'Your Majesty could have gold fish in the moat.'

'Remember - when Daylight Saving Time ends, we have to give everything a slight turn to the left.'

Summer Tip #26: Never use your chest as a beer can holder while sun tanning.

'Boy it's hot today!'