Cheerful Conversationalist Prints

Nice Old Ladies Tend to Look at the Bright Side of Things: 'As kids my brother and I took turns beating each other up!' 'Well, I think it's wonderful when kids take turns!'

PSA Banter.

Why we need poetry. . .

"Idea?" "No. Just a light bulb."

"First, I sent a rocket of a drive down the fairway, then I took the 7-iron, put that ball on the green...a hundred and eighty yards if it was an inch..."

"Happy anniversary, dear… 'happy wife, happy life!'" "That's because nothing rhymes with 'happy husband.'"

'That's the corkage fee you wanted to ask about, Jack, not the cleavage fee!'

"I love it when your eyes blaze like that; you remind me of Moses."

Remember my mum? I took that photo a week before she died. There's one of me...that was a good haircut.

Crow and fox

"Darling, do you ever worry that we're becoming some sort of Merchant-Ivory production?"

Kid to kid: 'I can't be wearing out my welcome. I didn't even step on it.'

'I do so much better with women when I quit trying to understand them and just repeat what they say to each other.'

'Casual Friday's never caught on in this department.'

"Are we ‘still working’? No, we’re still eating. You, however, are ‘still working’—now get lost!"

LEMONADE, 'Actually, I hate places like this.'

"Oh Gregori! You tell such funny stories!"

"Do excuse me, I've got a nuttiness allergy."

"Why... are there so many people who never eat pork? Because we have some excellent PR people working on our behalf."

Jokes machine.

Snow is falling...

The Algonquin Round Table

'The bar association barred me from going before the bar...So I came to a bar.'

"You look quite presentable when you make the effort. Your ex-wife always told me you scrubbed up well."

"Virginia Woolf meets 'Car Talk.'"

"Tell her I'm exercising my twenty-first amendment rights."

Bat out of Hell

"So, what is your star sign?"

'Well - how has everyone wasted time and energy today?'

'Fancy a good time - no strings attached?'

"Gracie, you're a good mud artist."

'Every time I go on an ego trip, I get hijacked by terrorists!'