Chart Maestro Mugs

'As you can see from these full-colour charts, we're spending a lot of money on toner.'

'On your mark. Get set. Create!'

Horti-Culture

"Let's say you've always wanted to make someone a mixtape to show them how much you care about them. What's the best order? Do you start with songs about how rich you are before moving on to the songs about love? Or vice versa?. . .What order would best simulate sincerity?"

Hildegard von Bingen

Piano and Pianist with broken legs.

Mendelssohn Finds His Inspiration

'By golly, I think we've got ourselves a prodigy!'

Dynamite little combo

Trilby - 'A voice he didn't understand'.

A baby playing on a grand piano

Orchestra conductor

Quartet.

"Eventually the instrument becomes an extension of your body."

A woman playing a keyboard

Violin Practise

Malcolm Sargent

Kultural K9's.

Edvard Grieg

'I'm a SNOOOW-Man,...doo-doot-doo-doo, doo-doot-doo-doo, I'm a SNOOOW-Man!...'

'He's working on a lullaby.'

"I solve mathematical problems, program electronic music, analyze environmental issues...but being a renaissance man isn't what it used to be."

Street Organ - Monkey

The Drummer

'I can't write cheating songs because my wife's too insecure.'

"The time has come for some tough cost-cutting decisions, and I'm forced to ask myself, do we really need a bass?"

'Like many studs of my generation, I have always had a love affair with the harmonica.'

Woman throwing giant pot.

Painting

I will be Bach.

'Cole Porter has the lyrics checked'

Cellist

Musical Eye Test

Sergei Taneyev

Ennio Morricone