Charitable Comedian Mugs

"I'm going to need a receipt."

'Just a word of advice ... He's a Saints' fan.'

Moses uses the burning bush to roast a kosher frank

Adam puts God on hold while texting.

"Thank you, and may the I.R.S. accept all your deductions."

When Holy Cows are sent out to "Pastor"

Inflation Is Up, Interest Rates Are Going Up. . . I'm Asking You To UP Your Donation.

Applause

You may have hired the best lawyer but I don't think that you can sue God because of a downgoing Dow Jones, sir.

During the Holiday season, Mr. Arthur Jeffries takes a little time to think of those who are less fortunate.

'Look, Brother Timothy - a sign from God!'

"Closed until further notice."

'Just remember to get your punch lines in before they fall asleep.'

Future Medicare Prescription Drug Plans: 'When I grow up, help me enjoy my retirement years. But if at first you don't succeed, try, try again.'

Sonny Bono - Singer/US Congressman.

The next step in human evolution was homophilanthropist.

Paper Bath Towels.

Corporate Head to others at meeting: 'Today is financial Arbor Day. We're going to find some worthwhile charity and plant a money tree.'

'...But I confessed to Oprah...isn't that in there?'

'Yeah, my head gets cold, too, but the hat sends the wrong message.'

'Forget it - the nearest wi-fi hot spot is in Rangoon.'

Street person selling bricks from wall he's leaning on.

"How do you tell the Son of God He's got spinach in his teeth?"

'Calm down. I heard them say we're just going into town for haircuts.'

Trump in Washington

"Your heart won't tolerate any more town-hall meetings."

'I'm sorry but you obviously don't believe in God because you didn't forward the religious emails to 10 or more people in your address book.'

Jesus sends the demons into the herd of pigs who jump into the lake, thus performing the miracle of turning water into "swine".

'One reason I like hanging out with you is you give me so many good ideas for my sermons.'

"Thank you for holding, your prayers have advanced in the queue and will be answered by the next available deity."

Campaign Headquarters: For a $500 contribution, the candidate will shake your hand ans sustain eye contact with you for five seconds.

'All profits go directly to charity'

'Thanks for the thought but we can't accept lottery tickets.'

"Before you say no to this prescription, let me also say that your monthly tax-deductible gift will help support a pharmaceutical executive in need."

"Yeah. What I remember most is that you still owe me money!"