Character Analyzer T-Shirts

"He'd make a wonderful main character for a short story, but I wouldn't put up with him for an entire novel."

"I finally figured out who you copy."

"But can't I be feared and loved?"

'I think I'll go home and eat'

"No way. Lando, my friend. Lando." "There's no way Lando Calrissian was a better betrayer than Alex Krycek." "Ask any passerby on the street. 9 out of 10 of them won't even know who Alex Krycek is." "That's utter foolishness. Everyone knows Alex Krycek. He was basically the X-Files' anti-Mulder. He could out-weasel Billy D. Williams any day." "Stop!" "When men start arguing over which fictional character was a better betrayer, they have officially run out of things to talk about." "That Kr

"Still, he might be remembered as the 'no cloning' President."

'Thank you waiter - my wife's the rabbit.'

'Listen, Geoffrey ...I know you're a clinical psychologist, but I DON'T have A.D.D. ! You're just incredibly boring.'

"You're not at all like your answering machine."

Give me a child at seven and I will show you the MAN!

'Oh it's fantastic. It's my thirty fourth favourite sub-genre of progressive rock.'

Interpreter for the hard-to-believe-what-they're-hearing.

"That's it?! Boy exploits tree, tree suffers? Shel Silverstein was nuts!"

"Feeling like a skinny person living in a fat person's body is actually quite normal."

"I can't see it lasting!"

"I love my unreliable narrator. You?"

Film critic critics

"I have headaches, stomach, pains, aching muscles, back pains, creaking joints, nausea and dry eyes."

"Your life's story lacks a protagonist."

'We need to ask Blah! The PSB to get the PCT to Blah! Put another GPWSI in the MSK Black! Blah!'

"Would you describe yourself as a bold character?"

"I can't believe the things I've heard coming out of his mouth since he started listening to Eminem."

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"I'm hitting a wall."

'I have a strong sense of right and wrong, but I'm hoping to overcome it.'

'Sometimes she's like a wave, sometimes she's like a particle.'

"I've concluded a meta analysis of the myriad of tests we've run and I think I can say with a certain level of certainty that you are probably screwed...."

Mr. Carker in his hour of triumph

Double personality

Nancy Ruth is speaking today....

"I'm glad you took the trouble to diagnose your own symptoms using the internet...and you'd be 100% accurate...IF you were a GOAT."

'I hurt my hand playing racketball, so you may find this prescription to be surprisingly legible.'

A Good Judge.

Egoism

"I thought I liked him despite his affectations. It turned out all I really liked were his affectations."