Celebrating A Dining Misadventure Prints

"Did you order the flying jalapeños?"

"Do you want ketchup on your steak too?"

"Don't panic, she'll be back. We lock the washroom windows from the outside."

'We don't bring you anything. That's the surprise part.'

"The scallops were delicious, but the fork was dismal!"

"No, no, no, my wife said she'll have a quiche!"

"Say when!"

'Don't bother to leave a tip, I had one of your fish fingers.'

'Are you sure you are not allergic to seafood.'

Chinese restaurant: In case of emergency break glass (Knife and fork).

'Please stand by. We have temporary loss of your roast.'

'No, everything is not all right. My date ran out without leaving money to pay the bill!'

'Hi. I'm Tiffany and I'll be your waitress tonight -- this agreement may be terminated by either party at any time.'

Sneezing dragon.

'How about a drink?' 'You've got gravy.'

'Here we put the emphasis exclusively on the food!'

'Tell Luigi to be a lottle more careful with the pepper.'

"That's my plate. They said it comes with a side of my choice."

Murphy's Slaw.

'This is a bit awkward, but we'll have the chicken.'

"How is everything?"

'No termites, no grubs, no leaves... What kind of crazy restaurant is this?'

"I'm sorry, the sesame peanut dressing is not agreeing with him."

A Respite Between Courses

'Separate cheques?'

'Dinner will be a little late -- I was overcome by the fumes.'

A man ordering Haricot Mutton in a restaurant

"I was looking at a food site, and I left the tab open overnight. Judging by the bugs, the food went bad."

'Will there be anything else, sir?'

"Waiter, there seems to be a toupee in my soup."

"Now remember: My dad’s obsessed with the weather and will hit on you, and my mother thinks you’re a gold digger."

"You don't have to eat mother's meat loaf. . . but don't give it to the dog. Last time he was sick for a week!"