Carnivore Captain T-Shirts

Eat Pork

"And I'll also take my steak raw thank you."

'Oh, and I suppose I'm the only one who's ever heard it's a 'dog eat dog world'?'

One Man's Meat is Another Man's Poetry

'Don't order the Super Duper Jumbo Special.'

"Gazelle's pizza! Delivered fast and delicious... Um, you guys aren't interested in pizza are you!?"

"May I offer you a side of life insurance?"

I Heart Dinosaurs Chef

A butcher and his apprentice.

'White meat or dark?'

Jurassic Country Club.

Cooked rare.

"Steak for breakfast, steak for lunch, steak for dinner. . . you can't stop evolution!"

'I dunno. Maybe we need a new slogan.'

'No! Not rare, not medium, not well-done: I want my steak raw! Thank you...'

Sick Of A Low-Carb Diet

The Steaks have a Last Desperate Attempt to Escape

Caveman restaurant: Oogs Pieces of cooked meet: Over one Dozen Served.

Too rare perhaps?

'Your businessman's lunch, sir — Raw meat and whiskey.'

"So who gets the rib eye and who gets the salad?"

"Hurry, dear, it's the Brutal Gourmet."

'Would you like it rare, very rare or still running? We close in twenty minutes.'

We'll have whatever they are

The food was nice...but something was missing.

Ground Game!

"Oh yes sir, white collar—very tender."

"The abattoir hasn't any butchers so you'll have to help yourself a bit more than usual."

"Forget cholesterol. We eat meat, and that's that."

'Eat my vegetables? - I thought we were supposed to be predators!'

'OK, it's a deal: I'll get you a Christmas Turkey if you get me a big Salmon...'

'Eat my vegetables? - I thought we were supposed to be predators!'

"Check this out. If you pace back and forth, it hypnotizes them and they give you a steak."

'Not at all, Mr. Porker, we already have several pigs working in our company cafeteria.'