Caring For An Aging Parent Pillows

"When your mother starts usin electric eels to boil the jug it's time to consider alternative arrangements."

"I think the most rewarding part of caring for elderly parents is when they call you because they don't want to bother the 9-1-1 people."

'Tiddles has left everything to an old folks' home.'

Every so often, Madeline gets carried away.

"He should be up and complaining in no time."

"My service animal for Alzheimer's, sonny!"

"Careful."

"Hey. Whatever happened to our sexual relations? "

'I'm fighting ageing.'

Toothless Meal

"My husband Frank still has all his own teeth...he keeps them in that jar over the fireplace!"

"I remembered that time you said you wished you had a biographer."

"And I got these stretch marks on my butt from sitting in the house for months back in 2020."

"At my age, your legs and bowels begin to go."

"The Lord brings people together for reasons only he knows."

"They've swapped the pub for staying in and taking their meds."

'I'll see your Social Security Supplement and raise you Medicare and a Canadian pharmacy ID.'

"You're on 'Ask Sadie.' What's your problem?!"

"The Doctor says it's very rate for the superannuated to get taller."

"Well, sometimes we take the dogs for a walk...which puts our fitness level at approximately that of an 80-year-old couple."

"I look forward to growing dead with you."

We would have come to you sooner, but he wouldn't ask for directions.

"I didn't know you could do wheelies Stan."

"Some day I'll be choosing your nursing home."

Old and young

"Look what I found, this beautiful Christmas poncho. Isn't it festive?!"

Mom & Pop Grocerette

"I wonder if she knows my collar's around my a**..."