Career Switch Storyteller Mugs

When staffing agencies screw up.

So which rung are you on my corporate ladder?

"This is probably not the time to admit I only joined the force because I figured we'd just be chasing cat burglars."

'If I'd known these programs were going to be so fake - I'd be psychic!'

"Hey, just wanted to say bye again, guys, I'm off to join the circus."

'Dude, touring with a punk rock band was fun, but what I'd really like to do is be CEO of a fortune 500 company.'

SNAKE CHARMER: snake reads 'help wanted' ad.

"Yes, I can use tools, but I realized early on I could earn more money as an accountant..."

Tell me a deposition, mommy.

'Then after the pan our third album, we split for musical differences..'

'What do you mean you're the new Paediatric Specialist?'

A new career for George W. Bush: taster in a pretzel factory.

Medical student overdrafts...careers in the law.

'Our goal is for you to successfully transition to your new job before retirement age.'

'I'm excited about my new job. I know I have some small shoes to fill.'

"How long have you been working from home, Mr. Farley?"

'He was a barman before he got into the demolition game.'

"Any experience?"

'Your resume says you have a B.A. in medieval history, a M.A. in modern art, and a PhD in metaphysical poetry. Have you checked us out on the internet? We design and manufacture detonation switches for drones.'

'The bad news, Pomeroy, is tht we're giving your job to your secretary -- the good news is that she wants you to stay on as her secretary!'

Respected Professionals

"There - is outplacement a challenge or what?"

"Grunzman, I really appreciate you. I appreciate you to work somewhere else."

'I'm hereby giving my two week notice and taking my last two weeks of vacation. I could use a positive reference. Thanks.'

The job is yours if you want it – but, of course, I'd expect you to sleep on it a few dozen times before deciding.

'So what you're telling me is you've been fired from the last 15 jobs you had.'

"Sorry I'm late again, boss. I got held up in self-doubt and regrets."

'And when I was fifteen, I ran away from the circus to join an accounting firm.'

'I'm sorry, but we're letting all of you go. Your jobs have been outsourced to India.'

'I heard you got a job at that new club. It must be great."

"Why yes, I love Charades! Do, it rhymes with 'wired' and is my next career move. . ."

'As a matter of fact, I can offer you another career option.'

Where Are They Now?

Dick rode through the night, the job offer to become a Pension Investment Opportunities Advisor was just too good to miss.

"Maybe we were wrong to hire him just because he looks good in paper."