Career Reflection Gifts

'No seriously. His final words actually were, 'If I only had spent more time at the office.''

Maybe it's now time to review our customer care strategy!"

'I'm your guardian angel and I think it's time you knew that for the past 37 years you've been barking up the wrong tree.'

'Of course being on short term contract, I don't enjoy the same benefits as the rest of you.'

'After being here for more than forty years - as undergraduate, graduate student instructor, professor - what saddens me most is that this was not the college of my choice.'

'How can this be? I was voted 'Most liekly to suceed' by my college classmates!'

"No, I like my job. I like my apartment. I like my friends. I like our relationship. I'm just not sure I like what it all adds up to."

'Now that they've cracked Fermat's Last Theorem, I don't know what to do with myself all day.'

"Tell me again how many young minds I will have shaped by the end of my teaching career."

"My jacket blurbs used to have such conviction, he thought to himself wistfully."

City Bar and Grill - "Forty years in the city and never once headhunted."

'Poor Jenkins passed on. He worked here for 42 years, he never called in sick and he always worked overtime. What an idiot.'

'The typical arc - child prodigy, boy wonder, flash in the pan.'

Attendance Has Dropped

"How do you know if you're under the radar or washed up?"

'I'm very good at what I do...as long as what I do is being overpaid.'

You are here.

"I could've been interesting, original and creative - but I decided to get an iPhone instead..."

'I can't believe I didn't get that promotion. So many people have passed me by I feel like a road sign on the highway to success.'

'Jake - how long have you been our youth pastor?'

37 years in the same position.

'I'm glad to see you finally pulled in sales. Nevertheless, you're fired. Here, we're dealing with socks and shoes, not with suits and shirts.'

'This recent report shows that we've got this whole work/life balance thing completely wrong!'

'I am an unhappy employee.'

CartoonStock Upload

"I've lost my mojo."

"While you're at it Houdini, try and find the last ten years of my life in there."

"Okay, okay - I'll keep my day job!"

"My career's in shreds, but on the bright side, so are my files."

'I had considered a career as an offshore commodities broker specialising in securitised asset transfers but the pension wasn't as good.'

Not much money, glory, or praise

"I'm 59 and they say I'm middle aged. Just how many people do you know who are 118?"

'Where do you see yourself in five minutes?'

Tonight's Lecture: Globalization. I've never worried about my job going overseas --- None of my jobs ever went anywhere.

Guys looks in the mirror and sees himself as a prisoner.