Career Planning Gifts

"And that's when he realized he wasn't on the partner track at all!"

Need a little help with your career planning?

"'Lunch'? Well, yes - but what are your long-term goals?"

Man with a Plan

"Based on your resume you're not really qualified for the job...but there's just something about you I like!"

"I see...and any ideas other than Supreme Leader of the Universe?"

'I'm looking for a career in something that will make me first in line for a government bailout if I mess up.'

"With a good education you can grow up to be anything I want you to be."

"Where do you see yourself in five years?"

'We can't make any plans. By the time we grow up, there will be professions no one has ever dreamed of.'

For 29 years, Bert's strategy had been to reach retirement without making any waves,missteps or career-limiting moves. And it might have worked, too, if only he'd foreseen the fossilization risk.

'Students who major in these subjects have a 7% less chance of moving back in with their parents after graduation.'

"Dad, now can I be a fireman?"

A backup plan might be a good idea, in case 'being a celebrity' doesn't work out...

'Where do you see yourself in five years? Still looking for work?'

'I don't believe in pressuring my children. When the time is right, they'll arrive at the default choice and go to law school.'

Careers advisor

'I have this fear of the real world...'

'Any backup plan in case your dream of becoming a YouTube sensation doesn't pan out?'

'...do I want to risk putting up with someone like me?'

'Maybe you could refer to your time behind bars as 'living in a gated community'.'

"So where do you see yourself in five months?"

"Early retirement is an OK long-term goal, Kevin, but most folks need to get a job first."

"My career doesn't reflect what my passions are as much as where my health insurance is."

"When you grow up would you rather be a Hunter or Gatherer?"

"What do you want to be when you give up?"

"My goal is to major in something that won't become obsolete in four years."

'Where do you see yourself in five minutes?'

"When you grow up, son, you can whatever you want -- a doctor or a lawyer."

One day, he hoped to hit the big time.

'Frankly - I don't see much chance of making a career out of backpacking!'

'What do I do now?'

Caged Businessman

'You have reached your destination.'

'I see from your CV you're all things to all men.'