Career Philosopher T-Shirts

"Oh yeah? Well, your dad makes more, but my dad's not stuck in a high-paying job he hates but is too scared to leave."

'Mom, what do I do for a living?'

'I've been at this for over 30 years now...'

'I wasn't always the failure you see before you, Axel. Once I was your age, with a life full of promise ahead of us and no excuse for not making it. . .'

'I started out as one of the good guys but I hated it.'

'For me, it's not just a job, it's a way of life.'

There's got to be more to life than just sitting at a desk...

Career Elevator

"I should've expected this when I took that dead-end job."

"What makes you think you're in a dead-end job, Justin?"

'It is our hope that the salary this job offers will take your mind off it's meaninglessness.'

'Your decade of experience is, unfortunately, from the wrong decade.'

'You'll have to decide - do you want to be top management in a small pond, or bottom management in a big pond?'

'We can't offer you the satisfaction of a gratifying career, but how does a paid week off and dental sound?'

"At this point in your career, your only possible promotion is to management where you will stop doing the work you love and use a skill set you don't have and we don't teach."

'I should have been a motivational squeaker.'

'I used to be a hunter-gatherer. Then my inner hunter killed off my inner gatherer. Now I'm just a hunter.'

'You don't know how much I envy you? You went into social work and I ended up in the city. You do an IMPORTANT job, people respect you, but me. What do I have?'

'Will that be for here or to go - and if it's to go, can you take me with you?'

Personnel. I figure since every boss tells you to forget everything you learned in school, not learning anything to begin with puts me ahead of the pack.

"Daddy has a job that's, hard to explain but he's very good at it."

'What bothers me about these meetings is even though it's work, I have the nagging feeling I ought to leave and get back to work.'

'Do you think, perhaps, that we could start shooting for a few longer-term goals around here?'

At the end of each day, Gary had approximately 7 minutes of free time – which left him feeling very vulnerable.

I'm looking for employees who have their own unique way of seeing things my way.

"I'm afraid 'It's a surprise', doesn't cut it as a growth strategy."

Business books - Who's Who & Who's Downsized sections.

"I still haven't decided if I want to be unemployed as an English major or as a Communications major."

"Don't flutter your little wings on company time."

'T.M.I.F.'

'I've learned a lot about myself at these meetings...like, I can fall asleep with my eyes open!'

'A few more years in this job and you'll learn how to delegate stress.'

'I play so hard that I have no time to work hard.'

"If you could be in any cubicle, which one would it be?"

'Don't worry. No one else knows what they are doing either.'