Career Commentary T-Shirts

110% Job Performance.

37 years in the same position.

"Where do you see yourself in 20 to 25 years?"

My brilliant career

'I can't believe I didn't get that promotion. So many people have passed me by I feel like a road sign on the highway to success.'

Maybe it's now time to review our customer care strategy!"

"What are your other qualifications besides 'my daddy owns the company'?"

"While you're at it Houdini, try and find the last ten years of my life in there."

Occupant.

Career Analyst "Well I've looked at your file and yes, your job is rubbish"

'Where do you see yourself in five minutes?'

'You said you wanted more responsibility, so I'm making you responsible for everything that goes wrong.'

'I'm glad to see you finally pulled in sales. Nevertheless, you're fired. Here, we're dealing with socks and shoes, not with suits and shirts.'

"She said that she's against combing marriage with a career....so I quit my job."

"It's my conscience... It's all achy"

"How do you know if you're under the radar or washed up?"

'I've been thinking about quitting, but it's the only thing that gets me out of the house.'

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'After being here for more than forty years - as undergraduate, graduate student instructor, professor - what saddens me most is that this was not the college of my choice.'

'And the recruiter from IBM - did you also tell him that at college you mostly sat on a rock by the sea, trying to find yourself?'

"Under our new definition of 'what is a sale?', he hasn't made any this year."

"Tell me again how many young minds I will have shaped by the end of my teaching career."

'No seriously. His final words actually were, 'If I only had spent more time at the office.''

"I'd like your honest, unbiased and possibly career-ending opinion on something."

"I've lost my mojo."

"Where do you see yourself in five years?"

'Of course it's not your fault, Smedley, but someone has to accept the responsibility.'

"I've been living vicariously through a really boring person."

'Of course being on short term contract, I don't enjoy the same benefits as the rest of you.'

"My jacket blurbs used to have such conviction, he thought to himself wistfully."

'As a consultant, my job is to speak to you as if I knew how your business worked.'

"Okay, okay - I'll keep my day job!"

'I am an unhappy employee.'

"Papi, when I grow up, I wanna be just like you!"

"You could do a lot worse then be good at football... I know... some people have to settle for politics."