Car Security Enthusiast T-Shirts

'It's ten o'clock. Do you know where your car keys are?'

'Where was the TSA?'

"Of course, if they ever start to suspect all their TVs are watching them back, we may have problems."

"You've got termites. The good news is I gave them all little phones to keep their minds off doing any damage."

'You can all relax and resume your game. The unattended bag discovered on the infield turned out to be the second base.'

"All it will do is move crime to the South Pole."

"Sorry kid, I work alone."

CCTV in church.

"Seriously Dad, it totally wasn't my fault."

The Ayatollah Bomb?

"Some fine day, my son, all this will be yours."

'What the … ? How did those thugs get into my car?'

"Rest assured, anything you say in this office won't get repeated by me."

'This biometric ID badge is part of the new security system. The badge contains my encoded retinal scan, fingerprints, and level of job enthusiasm.'

"If you're my gramma you wouldn't have a problem consenting to a retina scan!"

"Fifth robbery this week. That's not a security camera ??" a local TV news station installed it to save time."

'Don't worry -- the security camera is for your own protection.'

Adopt your wireless home security system today!

'Your father installed a security system.'

The prime minister: the current threat to national security...

'Someone is reading our emails. I'm afraid this means we're going to have to talk to each other.'

'Principal McWit, a student without an appointment is here and says he's holding your computer access codes for ransom.'

'They take patient privacy so seriously around here they encrypt your name!'

'This fridge is fitted with CCTV.'

All items on the premises have been marked for identification: 'My cat sprayed everything in the house.'

'Halt! User name and password.'

'It even has its own built-in home security system!'

'D'you ever get that uncanny feeling we're not being watched.'

"Your calls may be monitored for training purposes..."

'You're right, good joke, bad timing...'

"My dad put in a new security system."