Car Remodels T-Shirts

"Yeah, I'm just here for winter break. I'm staying with my aunt Maria. She lives down the block."

Man has a picture of a rolls on his garage door...the car inside is very different.

"What old school? This is my life."

"Do you buy cars here?"

'If I was this car I wouldn't let you in the drivers seat!'

Since we've remodeled, you are no longer here.

"Perfect."

"You bought a 1964 Chevy ragtop Impala?!"

"Well, my paycheck barely pays the bills, I might need a second job, my wife is on my case, and my dad's in the hospital."

"This says Hispanic life expectancy has risen to 80 years."

"Remember when I told you rust might become a problem in the future?"

Minivan Designed By a Five-Year-Old Boy

"Yeah, I'm working on my own customized car, too."

"Just to be clear, you want suicide doors installed on your hearse?"

"Wow! This car has a continental kit, train horn, smoothed-out firewall, polyurethane bushings and a 2400-CFM fan! I have a long way to go!"

"Let me guess...you got a job here because you needed new parts for your lowrider project?"

"You still working on your car?"

"I'm sorry Joet...I shouldn't be mad. In fact, congratulations! You saved your money. You deserve the finest ride on the planet."

'It's up for adoption. Just pay to have it fixed.'

'The only parts that don't need replacing are the 'fluffy dice'.'

"Cool! A 1964 Impala!"

'I heard you were going deer hunting so I camouflaged the car!'

"It's worse than I thought."

'It only takes a minute to erect the hood, or five minutes if the family helps.'

Spray painter.

'Orville keeps bragging about restoring that car. He fails to tell people it took him 70 years.'

"Whoa! This car has mag wheels, custom swivel seats...an awesome sound system and state-of-the-art hydraulics!"

'I can't believe I'm saying this, but I'm giving you a ticket for not speeding, but driving too slow.'

"So, it's not the battery then."

'What can you possible see in this piece of junk?'

Suddenly Jimmy didn't feel so alone in the world.

'Fins are back.'

"I won! My reader survey for Custom Cruiser Magazine was the first one returned! The editor is coming to town next week to take picture of my lowrider for the May issues."

"Why is the back of that car higher up than the front?"

'Maybe the tinted glass wasn't a great idea.'