Car Enthusiast With A Comedic Twist Gifts

Vet's car has broken down and he shoots it.

"Yes, I know they fit, it's just not what I pictured for a three car garage!"

'Yeah, truck makers are going vertical instead of horizontal with the extended cabs now. It's the latest trend...'

'Found your problem - there was a hairball in the gasline.'

All you'd expect in a British car!

"Do you have someone to drive you home after your surgery? My car's in the shop and I could really use a ride."

'Power steering.'

'Mr. Caughran to see you about a drunk driving charge.'

"I can't work on this one. It's too ticklish."

'It is fuel efficient, but my ego feels crunched.'

No U-turns

'D.N.A. tests show that the fuel pump doesn't belong to this car.'

Frog rearview mirror ornaments.

"Clean your wallet, sir?"

"Sick Ride!"

Baggage Claim: Anyone Who Knows How To Hot-Wire A Car.

'She think we're waiting out here in this sun? Hot-wire this sucker!'

". . . Hey, hold that thought, I gotta use the windshield. . ."

"The first adult decision he's had to make is choosing between driving and texting.

"So Ed, car in the shop again?"

'I see the problem.' Car grill looks like teeth.

Danger Loose Chippings

'I don't care what you say lad.....I say he was speeding!'

'Turning Left' lights on front of car.

'I'm not a bad driver, they're bad pedestrians.'

"Back so soon?"

"Could be just a coincidence, but that whining noise seems to stop when your husband gets out of the car."

"Let's talk accessories."

'I'm giving you a ticket for driving too slow.'

"Have you considered insurance, rego, third party, tolls, resale..."

"It's environment friendly- no petrol, no oils and no dangerous fumes. Only one drawback...It doesn't move!"

"I was thinking...what if you didn't get a car? Think how much you'd save! No car payments. No gas bills. No insurance. No repair bills."