Car Enthusiast With A Comedic Twist Gifts

Vet's car has broken down and he shoots it.

"Yes, I know they fit, it's just not what I pictured for a three car garage!"

'Yeah, truck makers are going vertical instead of horizontal with the extended cabs now. It's the latest trend...'

'Found your problem - there was a hairball in the gasline.'

All you'd expect in a British car!

"Do you have someone to drive you home after your surgery? My car's in the shop and I could really use a ride."

'It is fuel efficient, but my ego feels crunched.'

No U-turns

"I can't work on this one. It's too ticklish."

'Power steering.'

'Mr. Caughran to see you about a drunk driving charge.'

'D.N.A. tests show that the fuel pump doesn't belong to this car.'

"Clean your wallet, sir?"

'She think we're waiting out here in this sun? Hot-wire this sucker!'

"Sick Ride!"

Baggage Claim: Anyone Who Knows How To Hot-Wire A Car.

Frog rearview mirror ornaments.

". . . Hey, hold that thought, I gotta use the windshield. . ."

"The first adult decision he's had to make is choosing between driving and texting.

'I see the problem.' Car grill looks like teeth.

Comedy Club. Open Mic Nite. A car doing comedy? It it's like mine, it'll make funny noises!

"So Ed, car in the shop again?"

Danger Loose Chippings

"It's environment friendly- no petrol, no oils and no dangerous fumes. Only one drawback...It doesn't move!"

'Turning Left' lights on front of car.

"I was thinking...what if you didn't get a car? Think how much you'd save! No car payments. No gas bills. No insurance. No repair bills."

'I got us a stretch smart car...Neat, huh!?'

'I don't care what you say lad.....I say he was speeding!'

'I'm giving you a ticket for driving too slow.'

"Let's talk accessories."

Honk honk here, honk honk there, everywhere a honk honk

"Have you considered insurance, rego, third party, tolls, resale..."

Uh, you know spoilers are for aerodynamics, right?

"Could be just a coincidence, but that whining noise seems to stop when your husband gets out of the car."

'I'm not a bad driver, they're bad pedestrians.'