Car Commando T-Shirts

'Stop at the next chemist please, I've run out of tranquillizers.'

'Why don't you just pull over and let them pass already?!?'

'Here, we started to be investigated...'

"I can give you a little bit of focus on 2:53 next Thursday."

Executive Asks Death To Wait

Communication Breakdowns

Commando crashes into wall, instead of through window.

"Sorry sir, it's the permafrost again!"

A Lesson in Leadership: Misplacing your keys isn't a problem, unless you have to enlist the whole school's support to find them.

'There I was, all alone... salesmen to the left of me... salesmen to the right of me... salesmen behind me...'

'I didn't know you got one for saluting.'

'And I'll bet that there's a cute little war story that goes with each one of them.'

'That's not whitewash....that's detergent!'

Wendel maps his trip to the germaphobe society headquarters.

'I actually find my Ghillie Suit a better camouflage option than my stripes...'

Spring Cleaning

Telephone explosion

'The general says, I'm not only expendable, but also biodegradable.'

'The enemy sir. They've broken our code. Perhaps it wasn't good idea to use pig Latin.'

Pentagon

"Well, you call it note-passing and whispering. We call it networking."

Male Green Beret applying face camouflage - female Green Beret applying lipstick.

"No, she likes me best!"

General/medals.

"I've been asked to talk to you boys about 'rapid building entry' techniques

"Your new recruit's bicycle is ready, commander."

'Well, that's our case.'

Edward Cranston, four-letter general.

"Go to accounting and crunch the numbers people."

"We hired Steve after the copier kept breaking down!"

"Fire at will!" (Soldiers have names on helmets, Will looks worried).

"So, once again, Mrs Smith, it's grab handle, grip firmly, and pull straight towards you..."

'I don't hate Mondays -- I FEAR Mondays!'