Canned Goods Comedian T-Shirts

'We've done all we can, but these beans... *sunglasses* ...Have expired.'

Dolphin friendly tuna

"It's a 'Black eye friday'. I got it in a fight over a 56 inch TV."

"Charles didn't like tofu."

"For drinks or dinner?"

"It's this trend that leads us to believe we should supplement our oil commodities with investments in some of the Earth's rich vinegar and crouton reserves."

"Years of penny-pinching really paid off. The price of copper just went up again."

'Your drug tests show no signs of illegal substances, but they do show a huge amount of artificial colorings and preservatives.'

Ten business commandments, city trading floor

'The stuff legends are made of'

"I feel like I can't trust myself around food."

That was 16 items.

You're bored. Not true. It's understandable, you're a teacher on summer vacation. I'm not bored. I'm just kicking it. You've been staring at me for four hours. It's interesting what you're doing. Stocking canned goods. Fascinating.

'Notice: results of new studies: most of what was good for you is bad for you - most of what was bad for you is good for you'

"People take it more seriously than 'Please don't pinch the peaches'."

'Is this milk fresh?' - 'An hour ago it was grass.'

"I say my dear, would you pass me some ice please - the fresh stuff, not that frozen rubbish."

Chicken soup for the stomach.

"The spaghetti is too al dente!"

'Well, she ate the apple -- I SAID you should have the whole thing catered.'

'Well isn't it ironic that we come all this way for fresh meat, and only stuff we find is deep-frozen?'

"Good news, the migration has started: The wildebeests are coming!"

'Buck, the town's bein' attacked by tin cans! Sheriff's been lookin' all over for ya.'

Woman in frozen food isle see a sign: TV Dinners over a case, the dinners are marked CABLE, Dish, Analog.

'This could be a new record!'

Musical Frog

'Say... this looks like a good place!'

'Are you over 18 stone?'

"My milk is gonna spoil if I stand here any longer."

"I never use the Express Lane. I like to keep my money a little longer."

Cat Plastic Canvas Decoration Hungry for Bird Plastic Canvas Decoration

Sausage Machine

Supermarket anti-flatulence sign

Ernie, let's clean out the refrigerator. But don't throw this away. I hid my valuable, early-issue coin here. The proof is in the pudding! Help me with the produce drawer. A plum assignment! It looks like these tomatoes have been here for years! They're from my youth, my salad days! Please stop these wisecracks - you've gone too far! I disagree! I can still milk it some more!

"Scan my own items, bag my own food? If I wanted to work here, I'd fill out an application!"