Canine Dj Enthusiast Pillows

"That damn dog's scratching again!"

It is important to give your dog opportunities to play with people.

Knock on the door - dog stands up and shouts 'Beat it!'

"No no, I said sit!!"

'I wonder if they have any water filters?'

"No, no - it was great. It's just that sometime I'd like to try it missionary style."

Dog Hunting Trophies.

'Hey Harry, you know you've been walking around with a biscuit on your nose for the last two hours?'

"Why, you little Shih Tzu."

'Table scraps, doggie-bag goodies, dropped hot dogs, the cat's dish of food and your master's slippers.'

"Parts of a dog" "Hears food drop" "Smells food" "Chews food" "Swallows food" "Digests food" "Moves toward food" "Signals for food" "Makes room for more food"

'Just taking the dog for a walk, Dear.'

"I'm new here. How much do we leave for a tip?"

"They're friendly, but they're also carnivorous, so remember that when you're called on to beg and roll over."

His Master's Thesis.

Woman leaves dog in rain...he gets into a car to wait in the dry.

"I finally caught you... now what?"

Dogs life

'...and remember, son, never throw up on an old carpet...wait until they get a new one!'

Dog fetching clown shoes.

'Oh, oh, a pack of dogs! Stand still amd maybe they won't notice us.'

"I wasn't howling at the moon. I was singing along to my iPod."

"....And what's the deal with fetch? You want the stick or don't you? Make up your mind already!"

"The article says there was a break-in at the museum last night. I don't suppose you know anything about that."

"No I said fetch , not wretch.."

'You're supposed to just lick the cone!'

"Well, that will never be a yoga pose."

'Technically, he's on a leash, so I say we let this one go.'

"I always get the 'Good Boy.' How about the 'Bad Dog' for a change?"

'If I don't chew this, my S.A.T. scores will skyrocket.'

"His mother was a poodle and his father was a shoe."

Menu: Wet food. Dry food

"I see you mister mail carrier... that's it, just keep walking... don't even think abo—did you just look at my house?! Are you looking for trouble? Cujo ain't got #!@* on me."