Canine Clean-up Captain Pillows

"What kind of 'best friend' expects you to pick up their sh*t?"

"I'm beginning to think that buy one, get one free is not always a good thing."

"Do you recall the exact moment the balance of power shifted?"

"Cheers mate, you've done me a solid."

'Looks like everyone has FINALLY gone home.'

'For our next party, let's invite a carpenter, a painter and an upholsterer so they can help us clean up afterward.'

"I'm not just cleaning up - it's part of a conversation I'm having with Mum."

'That's my mom... she's sort of a CEO, an action committee, and a janitor all rolled up into one.'

"Wet wipe?"

'A Dust Cow'.

Giant sandwich bags.

Troubles with a vacuum cleaner

Nature Scents Research Department.

This is your park - get busy and clean up the doggie-doo!

"After Thanksgiving dinner, the only thing more stuffed than me is the dishwasher."

'I give up! Let's exchange this for an easy-to-clean cage!'

'Growing a beard?' - 'Yes, not so much face to wash.'

Family looking to buy a dog.

Buffing Cars.

"Uh-huh...you said clean my room! Nothing was mentioned about the closet!"

'Let's face it. We have an environmental crisis of our own!'

'I know he doesn't like this house, but he'll just have to get used to it.'

'I told you we weren't pet people.'

'If you want your husband to help out more, buy this one.'

'Tou've just missed him. The dog's taking him for a walk.'

"Whaddya gonna do? It's an act of dog."

"I just do the little things that don't show up in the box score."