Canine Career Coach T-Shirts

Dog Training For The Ninties

I hope a starting salary of 80 and a severance of 12 is acceptable....

'This job is for a 30 hour week. . .but to achieve that you need to work 60 hours a week.'

'And remember to emphasize we're giving them the opportunity to find a better job.'

Others will fight for you

'So far, I've taught him to fetch.'

'I'd say he's 10 percent 'pet' and 90 percent 'Lord and Master of All He Surveys'.'

"No no, I said sit!!"

Business books - Who's Who & Who's Downsized sections.

'Don't think of it as being a yes man, think of it as being an employed man.'

Work/Life Balance

'Very impressive educational background...now let's discuss WHO you know.!

Growl - Hiss Conflict Resolution Meeting

'I clawed my way to the top and then I clawed my way back to the middle.'

"I hate performance review season."

"Moments like this make me glad I taught you how to fetch mojitos."

'As it's your first day we're going to start you on something easy.'

"Hiring someone to replace me and then expecting me to train him just doesn't sit well with me."

"Actually, it's more like a mouse race."

'Your decade of experience is, unfortunately, from the wrong decade.'

'When I was young, I said I'd make it big or know the reason why - Well, I sure know the reason why!'

"So what makes you think you're qualified for this job?"

"For the sake of not being redundant, your honor, I feel that one 'bad dog' is sufficient."

'It's okay - he knows how to use the GPS.'

"Um, Larry? That’s not a quail."

"I'm seeing some dominance issues."

"He's got no idea how to run a Husky team."

'Perkins, we're getting rid of some of the dead wood around here.'

'Your resume is impressive, but next time try to shorten it from 100 pages to one.'

'Your main goal in this job is getting out alive.'

"I'm not telling you to stay. I'm talking to the stock market."

"I have a Bachelor's degree from Columbia, an MBA from Stanford, six years experience, and I'm a hell of a mouser."

Between Offices

"Back when I was your age the only way to get a promotion was kissing butt."