Campus Comedy Admirer Pillows

'Hmph. College kids.'

"I still haven't decided if I want to be unemployed as an English major or as a Communications major."

M.T. accidentally triggers the predator pursuit response.

Math 101, for those who can only count to 100.

"Let's talk film or let's not talk film - I'm easy."

Moses' Tablet

Frank was certain his Bird of Paradise mating dance would press all the right buttons with Margaret.

Saint George and the Drag Queen

'It says I missed freshmen Orientation and I have to take it in summer school in order to graduate.'

'I hope I run out of money before I flunk out.'

'Yorick? No, I don't think so, unless of course he was a Neanderthal!'

Cat Burglar

'Fancy you doing a curtsey and she being a non-serving royal, you big dope!'

"OK, fine. Perhaps 'sower of discord in the lower depths of hell' was overstating it."

Falstaff

Wordplay: In The Bag.

...gon make you sweat...gon make you groove

'Your fur looks like you slept in it.'

"Bill is in charge of our Ethics Department."

"Another flue shot, Larry.

'No, Ben, making your eyes go bigger does not make the fish grow bigger!'

New Flavors at Where's the Scoop Ice Cream

Hamlet

"What other tricks does he need?"

'Yes, I am impressed at how fast you got here, but where's my pizza?'

'When I was studying animal husbandry, I met the animal who became my husband.'

Cheating Death.

Storm in a magic lamp.

"So, how did the audition go?" "Great! I really nailed it."

'Mutation and natural selection? - That sounds awfully STRESSFUL!'

"And just how do you expect to become a made man, son, without a solid liberal-arts education?"

One Painting Says To the Other... 'Do you ever get that creepy feeling like they are watching you.'