Buying A Property Mugs

'Property investment? Good grief, I'm not THAT clever!'

"I've always had this dream of buying a little farm and then selling it off piece by piece."

'I'm so glad I moved into this basement flat Mary. It's put me on the property ladder and the neighbours are so friendly!'

"I've sold my airspace."

Chapel for sale - full service history.

'Take it easy, Mrs. Simms ! That wasn't what I meant when I said your husband just bought the farm.'

'Tell you what, if you buy these flats through us, I'll throw in London bridge.'

Urban relocation

'And if you look to your left between the condos and the ABD store, you can see the ocean.'

'Progress of a bookshelf'

"Liable to flooding? Whatever gives you that idea sir?"

At first I thought it was just coincidence, but then I realized it corresponded directly to your shift.

"Yes, I know they fit, it's just not what I pictured for a three car garage!"

'Betty liked the way her house provided lots of private space.'

"Our detractors call it suburban sprawl, but I prefer thinking of our plan as 'sustainable over-development!'"

Man sees sign stating dog for sale, house and land thrown in.

'For an explanation of the financial terms of this loan, please enroll in a continuing-education economics class at your local community college.'

Sign: 'Welcome to Fernbanks. Beneath our quaint Norman Rockwell-ish exterior beats a big-box chain store heart, ready to sell out at the drop of a hat.'

"You called me, boss?" "Yes, I overheard you talking to patrons about all the new planets we’ve found." "I want you to stop doing that." "At least until I’m done buying up as much of that real estate as I can. I don’t need any competitors driving up the prices." "Very bad man." "When the hipsters run out of cities to gentrify here, my properties on Gliese 581c are going to make a killing."

"But there's no way in hell I could afford Jupiter today."

First National Bank. Keep life exciting --- Ask about our variable rate, interest-only mortgages.

'What kind of alteration did you have in mind?'

Practical loans vs. devil-may-care loans.

"I'm bored - let's buy a house in the country that has lots of problems."

'And this is Eddy, he's been giving virtual tours long before computers.'

' ... and this is the half bath.'

"Aren't you the estate agent who sold us this house?"

Somewhere in France: "I thought I was buying goat cheese. I endedup with a chateau in the Loire."

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Reverse Mortgage.

"Since you had so much fun with the Home Equity Loan I gave you, this year's stocking will be filled with a shiny new Notice of Foreclosure."

"Of course you're feeling tired - you're in your sub-prime."

'Can we call a realtor now?!'

'The hard hats? In case of falling interest rates.'

Bank Loans - Thank you, I shall always be in your debt.