Buyer Pillows

'In conclusion; our major contract expires tomorrow, we have no idea what we want, and no knowledge of the market, It is time to pass this across to the Procurement Team...'

Eeny, meeny, miny, mo...

"When I hired you to improve our procurement process I was expecting more than go faster stripes on the strategy document!"

Fairytale procurement disasters

Every Friday lunchtime procurement managers would gather to boast of the size of bid documents they had received that week.

Karen was delighted that both her large and small suppliers had turned up for her industry day

"I'm starting to see that you and I have a different understanding of the term 'green procurement' Briggs..."

Salesman given 10 minutes under extreme pressure to sell to buyer

Public Procurement Portal

"Are you sure this is how procurement challenges are resolved?"

"We are thinking about what we need. Concentrate on our thoughts and prepare all the procurement documentation..."

"He always reads the small print."

Arabian Buyer

'I think we can safely eliminate bungalows from the search parameter.'

The contract was not worth the paper it was written on, which considering the paper was not a good sign.

"How can he achieve job satisfaction as a purchaser, if he never purchases anything?"

Out-sourcing man

Sales rep being sent through a back door.

Exit - "The receptionist said to see the chief buyer follow the arrows."

"Of course you don't need to tell me about your procurement plans for the year ahead. That would spoil the surprise and give us time to deliver value for money and who needs that?!"

The reception said to see chief buyer to follow the arrows.

Think Small.

"So we finally reach the summit of Everest, and who's already there but that pushy sportswear buyer from Bloomingdale's Tanya Urquhart."

Selling lemon latt�

"Excuse me, I'm here to do some sole searching."

"It's black, but it's not New York black."

'They've certainly got designs on your purse!'

A member of a very populous consumer group attempts to go shopping...

Your ad here!

"I'm part of the problem and loving it!"

Notice: this dress will be out of style by January 2009.

"Talk about energy efficient...every lightbulb in this house will outlive you!"

"It's beautiful. I'm just not sure it's $800 beautiful."

"I'll throw in a few extra pinstripes."

Vintage Dresses: Your Frock Exchange