Business Trend Watcher T-Shirts

'I'm counting on you to keep me updated on the hottest jungle companies.'

'I'm sure that one wasn't there last week.'

'It's only a hunch, but I think everybody bought everything they needed, last time.'

'The prevailing wisdom is that markets are always right. I think that luck is always right.'

At first I thought it was just coincidence, but then I realized it corresponded directly to your shift.

Emergency Hipster Beard

'The recession is over, again.'

"Using worst case scenario as a baseline, I consider this data quite encouraging."

"We're always excited to hear from analysts who are bullish on the market."

Final words on gravestones.

'Actually, they're a hybrid. They are a blue-chip, common stock.'

"I suppose you're all wondering why I called this meeting today."

'Why don't you use more blue? -- Blue is very popular these days.'

'What's this I hear about you going long?'

Business Outlook

'Our new simplified energy bills just have a few options starting with 'Grossly inflated' and progressing to the premium 'Bloodsucker' package. . .'

#notblessed

The Decline of the Euro.

"Which 'ism' am I this week, Ms. Trotter?"

'I just checked my portfolio and it's worth a small fortune. Unfortunately, I started with a large fortune.'

"Look the competition has a big, stupid product. We need a big, stupid product of our own, and we need it now!"

'Commerical real estates' man excited by peak in sleeping 'Rental rates' monitor

'Just this once, but I want a piece of the action.'

"When did everybody stop jogging?"

'Both were written this year by the same author.'

This horse isn't dead. It's just sleeping.

'And this is Bert, our intern. He's been with the company for 46 years!'

Wishful Thinking Magazine - circulation chart.

"Halloween stuff already? It's August!"

"Remarkable, but I'd feel so much better about it if we knew what the hell we're doing right."

Sales Research shows it's too big for them to carry home, sir.

'Sometimes I think the market is trying to tell us something, Ferguson...'

"I'm thinking of letting my bangs grow out."