Business Storytellers T-Shirts

"He'll never win this negotiation. He's saddled with numbers...but we have anecdotes."

'How fast can you hype?'

6 Brothers Falafel

Noah's life jacket demonstration

"So, you want to work at our firm, Eh?"

"I see you're an ex televangelist who would like to stay in sales."

'We have to forfeit, Three of our players got squashed on the way over here,'

'This merger will cut jobs 40%, reduce salaries 30% and increase the work hours 25%. Your job is to make this look like the best thing that ever happened to our employees.'

'The kids want a new motto: instead of 'slow but sure' they've come up with 'fast and funky'.'

Of course, we have to begin with certain assumptions. Let's assume I'm right and you're wrong.

"I called for you creative people because I feel it's time to begin my autobiography."

Wall of Office Memories

"Now the board will hear from Todd from Accounting with his free verse composition 'My Mistress, Brash and Beguiling – the Third Quarter Numbers.'"

'My office is always open to you Charles, at least until maintenance repairs the door lock.'

'With the economy the way it is, there's no silver lining. In fact we sold that last week!'

'And along with your promotion you get a key to the executive bedroom.'

Dollars Press Conference

'I hired a motivational speaker once, but unfortunately all of my employees left to get better jobs.'

Confident Business Team - We Know We Can

'It just got ugly. Ed from I.T. drank the entire water cooler and he wasn't even thirsty!'

"This is the deluxe edition Annual Report Director's Cut with restored graphs and alternative endings."

'Guess how much I sold today?'

'I eliminated all the platitudes and cliche statements, from your mission statement, and I'm left with this blank sheet of paper.'

'Figures can be misleading - So I've written a song which I think expresses the real story of the firms performance this quarter.'

"At last they paid off their sub-prime fairy-tale and lived happily ever after."

"Did you hear the good news? We're engaged to become work spouses."

Turning a business graph around to get a positive reading.

"Our market research predicts this product mascot will be irresistible to both men and women..."

'My job security hinges on the fact that I work cheaper than someone overseas.'

"These are my windscreen credits."

"It was an amazing half hour."

'Why do I always have to be the one to connect the dots for you people?'