Business Plan Strategist T-Shirts

New initiatives

"Looks like we found the issue."

"You've got your corner office, so what more do you want?"

'You forget, I'm a blackbelt in powerpoint.'

"Forget five-year plans. Let's just figure out how to make it to lunch."

Phrenology bust with sections for different currencies.

'Now that I have your attention...'

'It's only a hunch, but I think everybody bought everything they needed, last time.'

'We invest so much money in training staff...it's a mystery to me why businesses would risk losing them.'

"Marshall, somewhere out there, just waiting for us, is a loophole in the system."

"Tariffs love me...tariffs love me not..."

"These projections don't make sparkles shoot out my ass."

"Can I savor this for a few moments? The ball's never been in my court before!"

Golly, �1m a year isn't too much. I don't know why your shareholders don't understand you.

Robot Parts $5

'I think you are taking this elevator pitch way too literally'.

"Well, ordinary men have colleagues. Successful men have victims."

"I'm afraid 'It's a surprise', doesn't cut it as a growth strategy."

'This time we're going to do things right. And if that doesn't work, we'll just go back to stealing.'

'You could be a constant inspiration for us to come up with a plan to get a leg up on our competition...you're hired!'

'When we get there let me do the double talking.'

"Actually, she's just a figurehead boss. Our real CEO is an algorithm floating around somewhere in the cloud!"

"Another job well done by your conflict resolution specialist."

'Our product flooded the market... Before backing up a deluge of consumer complaints!'

'Whoever said 'The only thing we have to fear is fear itself' never had a room full of angry shareholders.'

'And remember to emphasize we're giving them the opportunity to find a better job.'

'You're my best man, Pomeroy, so I've decided to sell the damn company.'

Foreign Markets with Big Barriers

"How's everybody doing? I'm not boring you, am I?"

'I'll make my final decision on that promotion of yours, after this game.'

'We've financed three more startups for no fathomable reason.'

"Maybe now, we could look at customer care'?"

'The prevailing wisdom is that markets are always right. I think that luck is always right.'

"Right about here there was a flattening of the curve. . ."

'It's a deal, lets sniff bottoms!'